Funny, I never thought I'd be one of those "journal" people, but here I am pouring out the contents of brain for you, the public. But does this mythic public even exist. Well, who knows? I wonder who looks at my page, if anyone looks upon its contents, if anyone dares to bother. Ah well.
I plan on making some campaign for feedback, or at least for traffic. Yup, stickers around campus, maybe around town, though I'm not entirely sure yet. Seems like a good idea. And a forward that'll go around. Just ideas.
My teacher tells me my subject is identity and I guess he's right. Actually he's entirely right. I think about the subject a lot. But I also think a lot about how to translate these concepts into a video/performance/installation that might actually be interesting. You see, I was watching "Pleasure Heads Must Burn," an old concert video from The Birthday Party. It really got to the feel of punk and alternative shows I went to among my friends during my formative years as a little alterna-girl and eventually a "goth" chic. So much energy involved. No one in this damn town has any. I want to see more crazy performance art and weirdness. But everyone's too afraid and I guess I am too. The stage and the gallery are scary arenas and a hell of a place to catch people's attention.
Seems as though one needs loads of alky(hall) and food to get anyone to arrive. Which is a shame because there is some good art out there getting totally ignored. I'm very fascinated by alternative spaces and do plan on working with the idea of mixing media through performance, whether it be in the pretext of spoken word or music. Just kernels of ideas at the moment. I just pray I can stick with it. I'm nervous and worry too much so I tend to abandon things too early. but if I wait and learn and watch, I know I'll get to some level of creation. Where, I'm not so sure yet.
Well, that is really all this time. I suppose this space is a good way to get things off my chest, a sort of therapy, but that's sort of what art has always been to me. Shared therapy.
IS this what creates myths?
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12/8/99.2
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11/30/99